Theories of Deflation

No feeling dogs me more than deflation,
and it seems to hit me most in matters involving my dear bf.

Deflation makes you escape from Marina Square in a cab,
And upon getting home you slam the door in fury,
tearing down the room as best you can (bearing in mind who's cleaning up),
till you break down shamelessly on your dad's shoulder.

Deflation makes you sullen in a flash while you were happy,
tensed up even though you want his hug.
And clammed up,
as if cursed to be unable to blurt out the cause of the hurt.

Deflation depletes your enegry and happy hopes,
leaving you hunched and weary.

So what causes deflation?

Deflation is when, on Christmas day, you are specially dolled up in a new dress.
You leave your home at 1pm to buy him a special gift,
and then wait in eager anticipation.
You wait 2 hours, and then receive a happy SMS from him saying that his definition of arriving between 2-3pm means just before 4pm.

Deflation is when you planned in jittery eagerness all the special just-for-two activities for his birthday,
and then he tells you he doesn't want the beach because it's his 'heavy' (sinus) day today.
And by the way, he wants to stay home to play with a doll-like causasian baby.

Deflation is when you arrive in school, then take the train backwards
just so you can intercept him on his way.
Just to realise that he's decided he needs to take a cab today.

In essence:

Deflation = over-anticipation + sudden bubble burst

(in the presence of Michelle's stupidity + irrationality)

But then, it's really not just because of these effects that I hate deflation.

I hate it because I don't know how to deal with it.

It's pretty obvious I'm not too nice a person when deflation hits,

and it doesn't help that John suffers the brunt of it all the time.

If there's one last deflation effect to add,

that's me testing John's patience each time.

And for the record, he's been terrific.

I just need to adopt some anti-deflation measures.